Recently I linked to a great article from Calm.Healthy.Sexy. Here is part of the post:

This idea – that some things can’t be forced to happen on our schedule – applies to so many things.  Changes we want to see in our marriages, decisions we want our children to make, the outcome of an illness, our hopes for a business or project – all of them include elements that can’t be forced to operate according to our timing.  So while we work hard to make them happen, peace comes only when we allow them to happen in their own time.” [A Thought for Reducing Stress and Increasing Calm – Maybe the Time Isn’t Right]

Too Soon! © Stuart Miles |

Gaye is absolutely right, but there is another danger common to men – making something happen before God’s time. I have done this more often than I care to admit, and I know I am not alone. By pure force of will I can make something happen before it should. Rarely does that end even close to well.

We read about this in the Bible. God promised Abram a son. Sarai decided she was too old and suggested Abram help God by having sex with her Hagar, her Egyptian servant. Abram went along with this plan (dude, really?) and the result was a son named Ishmael. The descendants of Ishmael have been at war with the Jews for a very long time.

I have (mostly) learned God does not need my help, and I try hard not to conceive any Ishmaels. A while ago, we were talking with good friends about getting an RV and travelling the country doing ministry. I commented I did not want the RV to be named Ishmael! I want to be in God’s will and His time. His will at the wrong time is not His will.

Have you conceived any Ishmaels? Are you trying to conceive one now?

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The Bigger Piece of Ham Effect

April 15, 2014

Recently our pastor mentioned a true story about a church split. The two sides went to court (really?) but the court sent it back to the denomination. The denomination made a decision, but also tried to determine what caused the split. The conflict started at a church dinner when an elder received a smaller piece of ham […]

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Marriage Destroyer: Lack of Sex

April 14, 2014

Show of hands – how many of you have been waiting for this one? As “J” said recently, Sex Is Not the Icing on the Cake. The idea that sex is a bonus in marriage is contrary to what the Bible says about marriage. Biblically there is no marriage without sex, and a lack of sex […]

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Doors, Windows, and the Will of God.

April 13, 2014

“When God closed a door, He opens a window.”  ~ Maria in The Sound of Music I have heard the quote above often, and it has never set right with me. The idea of crawling through a window to get around a closed door just does not seem like something Jesus would do. Neither does it seem […]

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Sexual Preferences

April 12, 2014

A few comments from women who answered the What Your Wife Wants You to Know  “Just because I don’t enjoy the same things in bed that you do does not mean I am not interested in sex.“ “While I understand his desire to play in the entire playground, certain acts upset me and I cannot go as […]

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Friday Flashback: The Toilet Paper Holder is Up

April 11, 2014

Do you have a “honey do” list?  Do you hate it? Does it eat at your very soul? Okay, I exaggerate – but some of you know the feeling. Yesterday I put up a toilet paper holder and a hand towel ring in the bathroom used by my son and guests. I have been putting […]

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Why You Put Others Ahead of Her?

April 10, 2014

Yesterday in Charity and Love Begin at Home I talked about doing for other people things we are not doing them at home. I know men who say yes to everyone else most of the time, while often saying no to their wife. Understanding why we do something can help us change, so why do men do […]

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Charity and Love Begin at Home

April 9, 2014

One of the comments on the What Your Wife Wants You to Know survey read: “Why is it more important to help other people before you help me? — Why is it easier to say no to me and yes to someone else?” I have been guilty of this. When I owned a landscape and irrigation company, […]

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