Comments on: Counting the cost http://www.the-generous-husband.com/2009/06/30/counting-the-cost/ Daily tips on being a better husband. Wed, 28 Jul 2010 18:23:57 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=abc hourly 1 By: landschooner http://www.the-generous-husband.com/2009/06/30/counting-the-cost/comment-page-1/#comment-264 landschooner Mon, 06 Jul 2009 22:40:02 +0000 http://www.the-generous-husband.com/?p=1177#comment-264 Jesus does not example endless pursuit. He pursues to a point and at great sacrifice but His patience is NOT boundless. See what He says to Laodicea in Rev 3. One can pursue and pursue and pursue and be rejected and rejected and rejected. This part is my opinion: Eventually, pursuit can be just like casting pearls before swine. I am willing to be a fool for Christ, but I am not willing to be a lifelong fool for my wife. Jesus does not example endless pursuit. He pursues to a point and at great sacrifice but His patience is NOT boundless. See what He says to Laodicea in Rev 3.

One can pursue and pursue and pursue and be rejected and rejected and rejected.

This part is my opinion: Eventually, pursuit can be just like casting pearls before swine. I am willing to be a fool for Christ, but I am not willing to be a lifelong fool for my wife.

]]> By: tbright1965 http://www.the-generous-husband.com/2009/06/30/counting-the-cost/comment-page-1/#comment-256 tbright1965 Wed, 01 Jul 2009 03:01:14 +0000 http://www.the-generous-husband.com/?p=1177#comment-256 I'd say pursue to a point. If your wife is choosing affairs and choosing not just not to pursue you back, but to actively pursue others and choose to divorce you, then I'm not sure any amount of pursuit is going to help once a spouse has got it into her mind that you'll never love her like she wants to be loved, and she believes lies such as you never should have married, that God will forgive her for her affair, it was a mistake, and the married man she's having her affair with is her soul mate. Can God act in such cases? Sure. Does He? Not always. So I'd say in such a case, pursue until it's obvious that God has chosen to allow that door to close. It sounds so sweet, if only we would... Well, it doesn't always happen that way. Sometimes pursuit not only doesn't merit reciprocity by the wife, but it may lead to her running even further away. Unless God gives a husband some way to really understand a wife who is choosing to hide herself, no amount of study is going to help in that circumstance. I’d say pursue to a point. If your wife is choosing affairs and choosing not just not to pursue you back, but to actively pursue others and choose to divorce you, then I’m not sure any amount of pursuit is going to help once a spouse has got it into her mind that you’ll never love her like she wants to be loved, and she believes lies such as you never should have married, that God will forgive her for her affair, it was a mistake, and the married man she’s having her affair with is her soul mate.

Can God act in such cases? Sure. Does He? Not always.

So I’d say in such a case, pursue until it’s obvious that God has chosen to allow that door to close.

It sounds so sweet, if only we would…

Well, it doesn’t always happen that way. Sometimes pursuit not only doesn’t merit reciprocity by the wife, but it may lead to her running even further away.

Unless God gives a husband some way to really understand a wife who is choosing to hide herself, no amount of study is going to help in that circumstance.

]]> By: 1GoodMan http://www.the-generous-husband.com/2009/06/30/counting-the-cost/comment-page-1/#comment-255 1GoodMan Tue, 30 Jun 2009 17:28:44 +0000 http://www.the-generous-husband.com/?p=1177#comment-255 I completely agree and I also like what eppvolvo said. The only times there have ever been problems in our marriage is when I got tired of being the only one giving. Then life becomes miserable for both of us. I'm happier and we have a better marriage as long as I continue to give completely and whole heartedly. I wish that we were both working towards a better marriage, but if I really want to be happy I have to give all of myself to her regardless of how she responds. I can't help but think that Christ feels the same way about us most of the time. I completely agree and I also like what eppvolvo said. The only times there have ever been problems in our marriage is when I got tired of being the only one giving. Then life becomes miserable for both of us. I’m happier and we have a better marriage as long as I continue to give completely and whole heartedly. I wish that we were both working towards a better marriage, but if I really want to be happy I have to give all of myself to her regardless of how she responds. I can’t help but think that Christ feels the same way about us most of the time.

]]> By: eppvolvo http://www.the-generous-husband.com/2009/06/30/counting-the-cost/comment-page-1/#comment-254 eppvolvo Tue, 30 Jun 2009 13:23:11 +0000 http://www.the-generous-husband.com/?p=1177#comment-254 There is something missing here and I wish more people would understand it. It seems to be a lost art even among christian circles and after being on many different forums I am beginning to wonder if christains no longer have a good grasp of who Jesus really is. Even if your wife has issues that block her from really entering into the marriage with passion, both of you can still have one of those marriages that goes off the charts. How? By abandoning yourself to pursuing your wife with the same passion that Jesus pursues you with. I have talked with many men and women over the years who had a spouse that had issues of some sort that stood in the way of the marriage. But the people I talked to said that they did not let their spouses problems stand in their way of having a super marriage. They overlooked their spouse's faults and wrapped their arms around their spouse with passion and wonderful things happened. True, the mountain still seemed to be there from everyone else's point of view and some wondered how the healthy spouse could be so happy in a marriage like that. Yes, even in a marriage where there was sexual refusal there was incredible sexual bliss and they reached sexual places that few couples ever go. The art of pursuit is so lacking. The ability to give yourself up for someone else, study them so closely, understand them so intensely, their emotions become yours, their life melds into your own, that you can dance with them into the most blissfull places, and to keep pursuing them even though they never pursue you, will take you to a place with Jesus that few ever find. There is something missing here and I wish more people would understand it. It seems to be a lost art even among christian circles and after being on many different forums I am beginning to wonder if christains no longer have a good grasp of who Jesus really is.

Even if your wife has issues that block her from really entering into the marriage with passion, both of you can still have one of those marriages that goes off the charts. How? By abandoning yourself to pursuing your wife with the same passion that Jesus pursues you with.

I have talked with many men and women over the years who had a spouse that had issues of some sort that stood in the way of the marriage. But the people I talked to said that they did not let their spouses problems stand in their way of having a super marriage. They overlooked their spouse’s faults and wrapped their arms around their spouse with passion and wonderful things happened. True, the mountain still seemed to be there from everyone else’s point of view and some wondered how the healthy spouse could be so happy in a marriage like that. Yes, even in a marriage where there was sexual refusal there was incredible sexual bliss and they reached sexual places that few couples ever go.

The art of pursuit is so lacking. The ability to give yourself up for someone else, study them so closely, understand them so intensely, their emotions become yours, their life melds into your own, that you can dance with them into the most blissfull places, and to keep pursuing them even though they never pursue you, will take you to a place with Jesus that few ever find.

]]> By: djay http://www.the-generous-husband.com/2009/06/30/counting-the-cost/comment-page-1/#comment-253 djay Tue, 30 Jun 2009 10:24:58 +0000 http://www.the-generous-husband.com/?p=1177#comment-253 Amen, Amen, Amen, Married nearly 26 years. right on. Amen, Amen, Amen, Married nearly 26 years.

right on.

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