Do you treat your bride like you rent her?

March 15, 2010

in Good Marriage

Dave Carrol’s post “Are you an owner or a renter?” got me thinking about the way men treat their brides. Do you treat her as if she will be long term? Do you treat her as if you will have to live with the consequences of any neglect or bad treatment?

A house is interesting in that neglect does not necessarily show for a good long time. Failure to do maintenance can cause unseen consequences that will only become visible problems years later. You can put things off and not pay the price for a while, maybe a long while – but when you do this the long term devastation can be great, and repairs can be very costly. A wife is much the same – neglect may not show up at first, but eventually things will go wrong. Failure to maintain your marriage causes hidden problems, with the long-term damage to your relationship being great, and the “cost” of repairing the relationship being very high.

If you are not renting her, don’t treat her like a rental!


I have been married 34 years and I just recently figured out that the issues we were dealing with were a result of my failure to be the representation of God in our marriage from the very beginning. I in full agreement that every husband will receive the consequences of his behavior sometime - some soon and some later, but you will. God has opened my understanding to the phrase, "Love your wife as Christ loves the Church," to be that I am to treat my wife the way Christ treats me when I act and behave to him as she does to me. That means when she is doing the "right" things, then I am to show my love to her the way Christ shows His love to me when I do the "right" things, and when she does the "wrong" things, I am to treat her the way Christ treats me when I do the "wrong" things. This change in my thinking is making an awesome difference in our relationship.

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