As promised, I’m going to do a week plus of sexual tricks and techniques. My goal here is to give you several things you have not tried or even thought of, but do so without pushing the limits of “normal sex”. Something between “plain vanilla” and five pounds of ice-cream with every topping you can imagine. A few caveats are in order, with a starter tip below.
- I realise some of you have no hope, at least now, of implementing any of this. Odds are those who are in this place would be better off just skipping this series – why frustrate yourself?
- Others of you no doubt see my offerings as tame – if this is the case just go have fun with your bride, and thank her for being so great in bed.
- If you missed my Trying new things in bed post a couple of weeks ago, I suggest you check it. New things can make your sex life better, but going about it wrong can make a mess of things.
- These tips will, of necessity, be much more explicit than what I usually do. The language will tend towards the clinical, but explicit none-the-less.
First suggestion – play with the lighting when you have sex. Full light is great for guys, as we are so easily aroused by what we see, but most women are less aroused by sight, and they have body image issues that can interfere with enjoying sex. Less glaring light can make your bride feel more comfortable, but still give you something enjoyable to look at. Candles are always a good romantic choice. Red lights are fun, and make much of what women don’t want seen less visible. If you’ve always had sex in the dark, add light in small amounts. On the other hand, if you have always had the lights on, try sex in total dark. Focus on your other senses and see what you may have been missing.
Second suggestion – play with the ambient noise in the room where you have sex. If you have always had noise, try silence. The sounds of sex can be very exciting for both of you. On the other hand, the sounds of sex may be a problem for her. The sounds of wet parts moving together may make her feel funny, and she may suppress heavy breathing or moaning if it’s easily heard. Adding some white noise or music may allow her to let go better.
Tomorrow: Two Fingers of Pleasure