Building here on something I found in Finding inspiration instead of it finding you by Seth Godin.
Seth suggests that inspiration is something we can learn to have on demand. We will it; we make it happen when we need it, rather than waiting until it “strikes”. No doubt, this kind of a paradigm shift requires some hard work at first, but I agree it is possible.
What does this have to do with marriage? I think what can be do the same thing with love, kindness, generosity, and other important acts of marriage – we can learn to will them into being when we want them. Don’t hope they will be there when she needs you to love her, train yourself to have these abilities ready on command.
We think nothing of doing what is needed at work, even when we don’t “feel like it”. Should our bride expect any less of us? I’m not talking about lying or even faking – just do what you know is needed because you love her enough to do so.