Is grumpy wrong?

October 28, 2010

in None of the Above

The 19 year old boy man child just passed through, and as he did he apologised to me for being grumpy earlier. The “grump” was so minor I had to think to recall what it was. The reason for the apology is that he has regularly seen his mother and father do the same thing after being grumpy or otherwise less than loving.

This got me to thinking about grumpiness. Is it wrong to be grumpy? Is it wrong to be grumpy and not apologise? Is it wrong to be grumpy often and not do anything to change that? I think the clear answer to the last two is yes, while the first is less clear – bad moods and short tempers happen, what matters is how we deal with them, and that we work to do better.

I recall a time when we were going to be working very closely with a Christian couple for an extended period of time. She warned us that he could be grumpy at times, and that the best thing to do when that happened was to ignore him. While I appropriated her warning and advice, I wondered after the fact if someone should have held him responsible for his behaviour. I also saw that he was well able to avoid being grumpy in public, saving his grump for times when only his bride and close friends were around. In other words, the folks who should have gotten his best were getting something far less. Of course this is human nature – we don’t risk being negative around those who might pull back from us, while we feel free to be rude and ugly to those we think will put up with it.

If any of this has rung true with you, consider yourself held accountable.

1 comments
Eleutheros
Eleutheros

I'm glad you brought this up! Sometimes, yes, we do need to feel our emotions before they will begin to subside to a point where we can deal with the perceptions in our heart-of-thoughts that triggered them. And this is especially true of the many who have not yet discerned that our thoughts and our emotions are inextricable. However there is a HUGE difference between 'venting' to your very best friend (who should be your wife, by the way) and 'taking it out' on her, or on any one else, for that matter. One promotes trust, the other destroys it. Therefore, I perceive that 'feeling grumpy' is a sin because it is an excuse for bad behaviour. However, it ia a sin that can be easily forgiven, if forgivness is sought out and if this 'excuse' is not called upon to often. Because forgivness only goes so far in excusing your own lack of desire to confront the thoughts that are causing your emotion of 'grumpiness' as well as the thoughts you are employing to justify this bad behaviour. Been there, done that and that's why I'm glad you brought it up! It gave me a chance to share what I had to do to deal with this sin of grumpiness in me. Remember the kingdom of God is righteousness, peace and joy in God's Holy Spirit. So, I think it prudent to ask, "If these things don't define who you are, can you say that you are truly a citizen of the kingdom of God?" And, "If these things do define who you are, can you be a curmudgeon?" Ending these kind of bad behaviours is now possible, through Jesus' Spirit, so that you can be good, just as you were created to be!

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