I feel …

February 22, 2011

in Communication, Understanding Her

I feel ... © Colin Dyte | Dreamstime.com

Have you seen the “pain scales” now being used in hospitals and paediatrician’s offices? A series of faces shows increasing levels of pain. Research has found this a very useful tool for patients communicating pain levels to caregivers.

Maybe something similar could help you and your bride better share how you feel. Come up with a dozen or so words that describe the ways you feel. Print the words out on a full sheet of paper – make the words large. Put the paper on a bit of cork board, and put it in a private place where you and your bride will see it – the back of the bedroom door or in the bathroom for example. Get a few push pins – several each in two colours. Now place pins in the word(s) that describe your current feelings, and have your bride do the same with the other colour pins.

In addition to helping each of you know how the other feels, this will help you see patterns in both your spouses and your own feelings. If you have pins in “negative” emotions too often, what could you do to change that? If she has pins in negative emotions often, is there anything you can do to modify that?

Image Credit: © Colin Dyte | Dreamstime.com

2 comments
Scott
Scott

My wife and I ask each other what our "weather report" is. You can either use your feelings or put it terms of the weather...sunny, cloudy, raining, cold.

Jordan Hall
Jordan Hall

I think this is a great idea. I'm a counselor and couldn't agree more. I'm glad to see such helpful postings. Please keep up the great work!

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