In Is Sex The Key? the author says “I am starting to wonder if sex is the gateway drug to personal transformation.”
I have seen this in women – a sexual awakening is followed by all manner of great changes. It’s like the doors have been opened and the chains removed, and she is free to become who she really is. I’ve seen something similar in a few men, although not usually as significant.
My guess is that we can’t hold back just one part of ourselves. Our personality is not made up of separate parts that can be suppressed without affecting other parts. Trying to repress one part – such as our sexuality – will suppress other parts. By ending the suppression of our sexuality, we release the other parts that have been held back. Additionally, the growth and change in our sexuality precipitates other changes.
To try to make this observation useful, I wonder if it would be possible to help your bride get more free sexually by figuring out what other things are being held back because of sexual repression. Would urging her to grow in those other areas make it easier for her to open up sexually? Would encouraging her to sing, dance, or start playing an instrument she gave us years ago, shake some things loose sexually?
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