The reason I bring this up is that for most of my adult life I said I did not like snow. Thing is, I didn’t really know snow for most of my life. From age 4 to age 45 I lived in Austin Texas, which gets very little snow. Several years could pass without snow, and when we did get snow (all of ½ to 1 or maybe almost 2 inches of it), the city shut down because no one had the equipment or experience to deal with snow. Once I was past liking snow because it meant no school, snow was nothing but a hassle. Besides, there was never enough to cover things in the white beauty that snow can be.
Then I moved to the Northeaster part of Washington State – where snow is a part of life for four to five months a year. Now I live where people have the equipment and knowledge to deal with snow. I have gained the tools and understanding needed to handle snow. What’s more, I have seen the world transformed by snow. I have seen snow change how people think and act, how it changes their focus, how it changes one’s entire frame of mind.
The point here (no really, there is one) is that I disliked snow because I did not know snow. I had a taste of it, but that taste was the bad and not the good. Moreover, much of the bad was only bad because I (and my city) was unprepared to deal with it. I think we do this with other things in our lives – we get a limited, incomplete, inaccurate taste, and we decide we don’t like it, don’t need it, and don’t want it.
An obvious example of this is the woman who “does not like sex”. Her dislike is based on a skewed experience, not a real understanding of what sex can and should be. For men common examples are not liking non-sexual intimacy, or disliking deeply connecting by talking. Just like sex, these things can and should be enjoyable; if they are disliked, it is almost certainly a result of a bad experience or experiences that do not represent what those things can be.
I used to think I did not like snow. This year I have been eagerly awaiting it, even as I raced to get certain outside projects done before the snow shut me down. When it started to snow yesterday, I was glad, and when I realised it would all be melted in 24 hours I was a bit sad.
What could you or your bride go from disliking to enjoying?