A few months back someone sent me an email in which they said “my wife (I won’t call her my bride) …” Apparently, he thought it was silly or something like that.
Why do I call Lori my bride more often than I refer to her as my wife? I think words matter, and the words we choose have power both to shape both how we see things and how others see things. Three good things come from my choice of “bride”:
- When I call Lori my bride, it communicates something different to you from when I call her my wife. For most, I think it communicates a different level of love and interest. A man who says “wife” may or may not feel that way, while a man who says bride is far more likely to do so.
- My use of “bride” rather than “wife” makes Lori “feel a bit more special”. It better communicates my love and caring to her, and that’s a good thing for both of us.
- Finally, I think my choice of the word bride had a subtle, positive effect on how I think about her. My verbiage reminds me of how much I love her, and keeps my focus where I want it.
Is there some place in your marriage where a word change might communicate something more accurately? Is there some place where a word change might affect how your bride sees herself? Maybe your current word choice makes her feel bad, or unimportant, or maybe it does not make her feel as important as you think she is.