It seems we live in a world that looks down on “different”. Even in so-called “open minded” circles, only certain differences are tolerated, and even fewer are praised.
What about your marriage - is it open to different? Do you and your bride “allow” each other to be unique, or do you work to keep each other within certain bounds? I’m not talking of moral things here, but of different ways of seeing things, and different ways of doing things.
The great thing about different is that it sees things that the crowd does not see. Different sees ideas and beauty, and innovation that others miss. Different sees a way to solve a problem that the norm can’t see. When we discourage different we reduce society; when we encourage different we enrich society. In marriage it’s the same way; encouraging your spouse where she is different enriches your marriage, while limiting her limits your marriage in many ways.
By the way, this one is a bit personal to me. I am a bit eccentric. Actually, I am a bit more than a bit eccentric. Early in our marriage, my bride was often embarrassed by/for me or concerned about how I might be perceived. I fully understand why she felt this way. However, she did not stay embarrassed or concerned – she grew to accept and to love (most) of my oddities. She still warns me if she thinks I am going to offend or hurt others (and I am deeply grateful for that), but she has given me the extreme gift of acceptance. You can give the same gift, if you choose.
{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
Diversity…without division
Unity…without uniformity
@Marvin – I like it. Thanks for introducing me to Tim Chester.
I’ve had to learn this about my husband concerning his walk with God. God has given him different passions and a different path to follow than he has given me. I am much more family centered and he is more concerned about false teachings. I had to keep telling myself, they are both good and necessary. He is not wrong because he is not passionate about the same things I am.
Difference is a nice opportunity to bring interest/surprise/novelty/fun in the couple. It enriches: who wants to have a dull life? Of course if you’re TOO eccentric than maybe it could be a sanctified path for your spouse…