You can’t pick and choose in these things, specializing in keeping one or two things in God’s law and ignoring others. The same God who said, “Don’t commit adultery,” also said, “Don’t murder.” If you don’t commit adultery but go ahead and murder, do you think your non-adultery will cancel out your murder? No, you’re a murderer, period. [James 2:10-11 The Message]
Let’s be honest, we all do this – we feel good about ourselves for all the sins and wrongs we don’t do, while trying hard not to think about all the sins and wrongs of which we are guilty. Many of us do the same thing in marriage – never hit her, never cheated, never started at an under-dressed woman for more than ten seconds… According to James, that is not good enough. Neither God nor your bride is going to excuse something you do wrong just because you have not done other wrong things.
I do realise none of us will reach perfection in this life, but that is not what I am talking about. No matter where you are, you can do better. No matter how many wrong or unloving behaviours you have dealt with, there is another one you can work on. The goal is to always be growing, always be becoming better, always getting closer to prefect. Don’t settle, don’t think you have done enough – it’s a trap! If you coast very long, you lose ground.
It’s good to look at what you have overcome – to be encouraged by what you have beaten. Use that to move you to more, to better, to conquering another place where you are not the best husband you can be.
Links to blog posts that stood out to me this last week:
Black and Married with Kids
Are You Ready To Upgrade Your Marriage?: You know you need to!
Still Standing: What Lies Do You Believe About Marriage? : Lies will kill your marriage.
The Generous Wife
Start Again?: A question you really need to ask your bride!
Happily Married After
Hot, Holy and Humorous
Where to Have Sex: Part 2: If you are trying to get your bride to have sex beyond the bedroom, this article by a woman and for women can’t hurt!
Journey to Surrender
Foundations, Framework and Fixtures: Is your marriage built right?
Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage
Selfishness in Marriage: Choose to lose!
10 Ways to Become a Cheater: Have any of these in your life?
Finding Hope: For those who have been through a miscarriage, or close to someone who has.
One Flesh Marriage
Man Cave or Couple’s Cave: Brad gets it – do you?
Romantic Act of the Day
…to Love Honor and Vacuum
Kids Pick Up Our Attitudes About Sex: What are you teaching them?