Know your wife

November 26, 2012

in Seeing Clearly, Understanding Her, YOU4HER

I don’t think I’ve ever posted a proposal video, but this one opens up a great point, so check it out.

What I saw in this was a man who knew his gal. He knew his practical joke would be well received. Some women would have totally panicked, some would have been furious when they found out it was a joke. Some might have refused to marry over it, or held a grudge for years. This woman seems to have gotten the joke, and understood it was a part of who her guy is.

I call it knowing your audience. I learned this early in life; given how far out there I can be, I might not have survived had I not! In the past Lori would get uptight when I said or did something a bit “out there” (or more than a bit out there) to someone or in front of a small group. She had limits for people she did not know well, and it seemed to her I had no such limits. Over time, she has learned I am very good at knowing what someone can appreciate and what will offend them. More to the point of this discussion, I am very good at knowing what she will find humorous and what she will not. I also know when I can tease her, and when I should not. I am not perfect, but I have learned her well and I rarely mess it up.

Because I know her so well, I can give her what she wants or needs. I know when funny will help her out of a funk, and when it will just upset her. I know what makes her laugh, and what does not. I can bless her far better than if I just followed some generic script for what one does and does not say and do with one’s wife.

How well do you know your wife? How close to the edge can you get? Do you crowd the edge or go over the line? Are you are so scared of hurting or offending her you hold back? Become a student of your wife.

3 comments
workinprogress
workinprogress

I loved this... it made me cry. Thanks for sharing.

Rosemary
Rosemary

I am not an uptight person who can't be teased or who doesn't like humor, joking and laughter. In fact, some people think my sense of humor goes a bit too far at times. But I've never understood the humor in creating fear or messing with someone's reality, whether it is wasting the pizza delivery man's time and money by calling in a fake order, embarrassing someone with a no-win situation on hidden camera, or putting someone you love in fear of her life. I get your point about knowing your audience. But I still can't help feeling that there is a serious problem with this kind of so-called joke over something so serious. In their future together, how can she ever really know that he is being straight with her over important matters? Will he set up an elaborate joke about losing his job or about one of their children being in an accident? How can she ever truly trust anything he says?

The Generous Husband
The Generous Husband

Rosemary - I don't get that kind of joke either, and would not personally do something like that. It does seem to be more common today than in the past - maybe it's more accepted by the younger crowd. That said, she can never say she was unaware of the kind of jokes she signing on for! Cleary she was okay with it!

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