Check Marriage Growth from Time to Time.

April 16, 2013

in Encouragement, Seeing Clearly, Words of Affirmation

Do you ever look at your marriage, compare it to how it was in the past, and judge if there has been growth?

I suggest you do this regularly. If there has been growth, you’ll be encouraged. If there hasn’t been growth, you might be encouraged to focus more on your marriage. If things have gotten worse, see it as a significant warning sign and take action.  

measuring tools © Vadidak | Dreamstime.com

This crosses my mind because Lori and I have had a very rough half-dozen days. We have dealt with taxes, which were far worse due to lost computer files, web site problems (the day job, the marriage ministry, and helping a few friends), and sickness. It was the perfect recipe for getting frustrated, being cross with each other, or otherwise not practising what we preach. While we have not reached the point I hope and believe we will, we both felt we handled the stress and problems much better than we would have a couple of years ago. Aside from feeling good about that, we both feel a lot less beat up than we would have in the past.

Next time you have a rough few days, take time to think about how you, your wife, and your marriage dealt with the situation. Honestly compare with the past, and then do what seems right to make next time better.

BTW, when your bride does a better than usual job of dealing with things, be sure to tell her that, and even brag on her to others if appropriate. Which leads me to this: Lori did a great job of having all the tax data together this year, and she handled the stress of doing taxes better than she ever has – in spite of this year’s difficulties.

Finally, if you are a new or occasional reader, please don’t think I/we have it all together. I’ve shared my failing here on occasion, and I have no lack of those. For more on that, see Lori’s post for today.

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1 comments
HotHolyHumorous
HotHolyHumorous

Paul, this is such a good point because I've said that the worst times in our marriage were when each of us was under a lot of stress. With both of us feeling pressure, neither one felt equipped or eager to comfort and encourage the other. I'm sad to admit that sometimes instead, we just took things out on each other. But we've gotten better! We can feel those times coming and try to readjust our outlook and pray for an extra pound (or ton) of patience. Affection and laughter through those tough times also help us through.

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