A few days ago, The Forgiven Wife posted a great read entitled Denying My Husband, Denying Myself. While she was talking specifically about sex, the principle applies to most of marriage.
When I deny my wife something, I hurt both of us and I limit my marriage in multiple ways. Marriage is not a bunch of unrelated parts; the parts are all interconnected. Remove a part, and other parts change or fail. Give a part more or less preference and other parts grow or shrink. This is unavoidable, even if we try our hardest not to let it happen. When we withhold things like love, respect, sex, real conversation, and time together, we start a cascade of events that hurts both of us and does great harm to our marriage. Again, these negative results are inevitable – cause and effect beyond our power to prevent.
The good news is the cascade of changes can also work for good. If you start giving your wife more of something they want, the result is growth and positive changes in multiple areas. Positive changes are often slower and less significant than negative changes, but the changes are still there.
What does your wife want more of from you? Do you love her enough to give her that? Do you love her enough to give it to her even if it’s difficult or costs you something? This is where real love shows itself!