Ten days ago, I wrote Gratitude: The Key to Happiness? in which I discussed studies that show thinking about what you have to be grateful for results in less depression and greater happiness. I suggested you give it a try for ten days. If you took that suggestion, I’d enjoy hearing your thoughts on the results.
Today I want to apply the same idea specifically to marriage. I think it is human nature to focus on problems and things that make us feel bad. We also have a tendency to ignore or downplay good things done by those with whom we are upset. This makes it easy to have a skewed perception of how many “good’ and “bad” things your wife is doing to/for you. It can become a vicious cycle; the worse you feel about her the more you focus on the bad.
S0, turn it around. Make a point of recalling the good things you wife does for you. Take time daily to think and write down the ways she had been nice, kind, and thoughtful. Once a week go back and look at everything you wrote down for the past week.
If you do this, it will change how you see your wife, which will change how you treat her. Both of these are good and desirable things.
What are you waiting for?