Lord Show Me…

August 26, 2013

in 2013 Awesome Husband, Seeing Clearly

It is so very easy to see what she’s doing wrong, isn’t it? You don’t have to try, it just jumps out at you: “if she would just…” or “if she would stop…” or “if she weren’t so touchy…”.

I just wish it were half as easy  for us to see what we’re doing wrong!

Upset couple © David Castillo Dominici | freedigitalphotos.net

Human nature is to down play and excuse what we do, while not doing the same for others. Most of this is so automatic we don’t even realise we’re doing it. The result is both husband and wife see more of their spouse’s faults and wrongs then they see of their own faults and wrongs. This can result in both honestly thinking the other is more than half the problem!

The next time you find yourself frustrated with you wife, ask the Lord to show you the following:

  • Extenuating circumstances: Why is she doing what she’s doing? Why is she upset, angry, frustrated or otherwise not being nice? The why doesn’t make her less wrong, but if you cut yourself some slack when things are rough, you should do the same for her.
  • Misunderstandings: Maybe you are misreading her. Maybe she’s upset because she has misread you.
  • What about me?: What you may have done to contribute to the situation.
  • Resolution: What you can do to help the situation.

A quick response to her negative words or actions is usually going to make matters worse. Slow down, pray, and find a better way.

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Image Credit: © David Castillo Dominici | freedigitalphotos.net

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4 comments
TonyB
TonyB

Yet sometimes, the big elephant in the room isn't you.  It's great to ask God to show you.  I even asked my ex-wife to show me what it was I was doing that she preferred an affair with a man who could be her father over working on our marriage.


I said I can't fix what I'm doing if I don't know what it is.

Sometimes, it's just not you, it IS her.  No amount of naval gazing and prayer will fix that if she likes who she is when she banging the other man more than she liked being your wife.

Prophetess G
Prophetess G

IT IS ONLY WHEN WHEN WE TRULY LISTEN TO THE HOLY SPIRIT WHO CONVICTS US

DOWN ON THE INSIDE CAN WE REALLY SEE THE THINS THAT ARE WRONG. i THANK gOD EVERYDAY FOR TEACHING ME TO LISTEN MORE TO WHAT MY HUSBAND SAYS AND NOT WHET I THINK HE SAID. GOD IS SO GOOD. THANK YOU FOR LORD SHOW ME. PG

Rock_His_World
Rock_His_World

Great thoughts: 

"Human nature is to down play and excuse what we do, while not doing the same for others. Most of this is so automatic we do not even realise we are doing it. The result is that both husband and wife see more of their spouse’s faults and wrongs then they see of their own faults and wrongs. This can result in both honestly thinking the other is more than half the problem!"

 That is so true.  We need to ask for the Lord's help in honestly evaluating our actions and the strength to make the changes we need to make!

TheGenerousHusband
TheGenerousHusband moderator

@TonyB  Very rarely it is so much her, or him, that the other person has no hope. Yes it happens, but not too often - fortunately. 

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