Last week’s survey asked wives:
“Ladies, what does your husband do that makes sex really great for you? It could be something that gets you really turned on, or something that leads to a great climax, or whatever else makes sex great for you.”
The full breakdown of the comments from the 77 ladies who replied can be found on the TMB survey page. Here I will share the story I think the replies tell.
The question was fairly open, but it did point to sex, not the relationship as a whole. Despite this, and not at all surprisingly, plenty of the women shared things from outside the bedroom. For most women sex requires a firm relationship foundation; fail at that, and women are uninterested in sex.
The most stated answer could be summed up as “Go slow”. She wants to be cuddled, and then kissed, before you grab her breasts. She wants to be warmed up before she is felt up! Kissing was mentioned often – eight times in general, and three more giving a specific place (neck or behind the ears).
As for actual sex, oral stimulation was the most mentioned act. Some only orgasm from oral, some get their best orgasms from oral, some think it’s the ultimate foreplay. I know some women aren’t comfortable receive oral, but for the rest it should be part of sex most or all of the time.
Making sure she climaxes first – and as often as she likes – got high marks. Other things mentioned a number of times were:
- Showing a desire for her, as opposed to just wanting sex.
- Talking during sex. This included feedback, loving words, or a narrative of what he is doing or is going to do.
- Being sensitive to her moods/desires. Knowing when to be soft, knowing when to be passionate, knowing when to push and when to back off.
- Telling her how much he likes and desires her body.
- Being all about her pleasure – selfless.
- Giving her multiple orgasms.
In short, get her mind and emotions on board, and her body will gladly join in.