A few days ago by bride posted Holiday Romance – encouraging wives to make time for their marriages during the holidays. When I posted this to facebook, one woman commented, “Would love to skip the holidays”. This is not a rare feeling. Both men and women feel this way about the holidays, although I think it is more common among women.
The holidays can be full of stress. There’s a lot to do. If you have kids they can get crazy, and they’re home from school for a couple of weeks. Many folks expect you to do and attend things. The joy can easily be eclipsed by the negative stuff.
Family is often huge problem. Everyone expects you to make an appearance, and if you don’t give someone enough time feelings get hurt. I know couples who spend more of Christmas day driving than being at the two, three, even five places they are expected to show up – often with more than one small child!
May I suggest you and your wife have a brutally honest conversation about this very soon? Find out what she likes and dislikes – and what she dreads. Then do something to make her holidays less horrible. Be ready to hurt feelings for the sake of your wife and kids. Let family know early on what you will and will not do, and stick to it! Do NOT blame it on your wife, be a man, and take the heat. Decide how much you can do, and say no to everything else.