I saw this quote on facebook:
“There are times that when truth and kindness conflict, one ought to choose kindness, especially when a little honesty is better than a lot.” Leroy Jack Syrop
I was pulled several ways at once by. How should that play out in a marriage?
As I’ve said before, I used to have a problem with the “in love” part of “speak the truth in love”. I have since come to the conclusion the love part is not optional, and truth without love is very possibly sin. If you can’t say it with love, you shouldn’t say it. If it needs to be said, figure out how to say it in love.
However, I don’t think we should avoid saying things that will hurt. Sometimes sharing a painful truth is the most loving thing possible. A painful truth can save the person even worse hurt. A painful truth may need to be shared to help or protect others. For example, if your spouse is too hard on the kids, a loving, private discussion is necessary for the sake of the children.
This isn’t about balance. When stated, the truth must always be shared with great love and grace. Some truth is painful but not helpful; how can one lovingly share such a thing?