Alecia of Marriage Life stirred up a bit of controversy this week with I’m Responsible For My Husband’s Affair (website now gone).
While I don’t fully agree with her that “Any one of us, given the right timing and circumstances is capable of having an affair” I do agree with her that we can push our spouse to commit sins.
Now before you tell me I’m wrong, let me cite my source – Jesus:
“…whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone fastened around his neck and to be drowned in the depth of the sea. Woe to the world for temptations to sin! For it is necessary that temptations come, but woe to the one by whom the temptation comes!” [Mt 18:6-7 ESV]
Granted there are other ways this is translated. Some versions say “to stumble” while others say “offend”.
We find a similar idea on Roman’s 14, where Paul warns us that flaunting our Christian liberty can result in another committing sin.
So can you cause your wife to sin? Can she cause you to sin? At the very least we can entice others to sin, and Jesus makes it clear doing so is a very bad thing with serious consequences.
There are two things you can do with this information. One is good for your marriage and your walk with the Lord, the other isn’t.
- “Ah ha! My affair/porn use/neglect/anger/whatever is all her fault! If it were not for her I would never have done it. I’ll just sit back and wait for God to zap her!”
- “Lord, show me where I’m pushing my wife towards sin. Help me to do better, and help me know how to repent and undo any damage I’ve caused.”
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