Why You Should be in Touch With Your Emotions.

January 17, 2014

in 2013 Awesome Husband, Must Read Marriage Book, Seeing Clearly

I have mentioned Emotionally Healthy Spirituality: Unleash a Revolution in Your Life In Christ several times (see my review here). I may also have mentioned I am part of a group of couples who are going through the book together. Some of our recent reading and discussion has been on being aware of and in touch with our emotions. This crossed my mind as I was replying to a comment on yesterday’s post on our susceptibility to having an affair.

When we know our emotions, and take time to feel them and think through them, we can be in control. When we are not aware of our emotions, they can easily allow us to get into bad situations, and can push us to do things we should not. 

If my wife were neglecting me, and I had thought about that, and how it makes me feel, and had worked through it in my mind, I think I would be rather unlikely to fall into adultery. On the other hand, if I were stuffing my pain and not working through my feeling in my own mind, I think I would be far, far more in danger of cheating.

 Mine Field © Jason Hollinger | commons.wikimedia.org

Buried emotions are like land mines scattered across our lives. We can get hurt by stepping on them, and others can be hurt by us when they step on them. A common result/sign of buried emotions is anger that seems to come out of no place for the most minor issues. 

I know dealing with “bad” emotions is no fun, and I get why it is tempting to stuff them. Unfortunately, they always catch up to us, and when they do it almost always ends badly for us.

mini-upgradeAre you in touch with your emotions? If not, learning to be will make you a much better husband.

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4 comments
DavidWCarr
DavidWCarr

Good reminder.  We as men typically don't do emotions well and have a lot of arrested development/immaturity in our lives. If we can't really work through our emotions in a healthy way (e.g., not staying in a hurt place), we won't be able to love our wives as Christ loved the church.  


Men - grow-up and face your emotions, listen to your wife and allow her feedback to help you better respond to her.  Don't get defensive or prideful, really listen and tune into your wife's feelings in particular.  As you are able to take them in you will find yourself able to better deal with your own emotions.  


OK now I want to read the book and dig deeper.  Thanks for sharing! :)

TheGenerousHusband
TheGenerousHusband moderator

@DavidWCarr I saw a claim recently that brain scans show men have stronger initial emotional reactions than women, but are far better as pressuring those emotions. I need to do some study on that.


Regardless, we do need to learn how to face and deal with our emotions.

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