A few weeks ago I did Marriage Destroyer: Busyness. This one is related, but it’s not the same thing.
I know busy couples who carve out time for each other. I also know couples with plenty of free time who spend almost no time together. It’s easier to have time together when your schedule isn’t crowded, but you still have to be intentional about doing it.
- Quantity Time: You need a good deal of time together, and you need some big blocks of time. For more than a month Lori and I have had an afternoon coffee date at a local cafe. No agenda, no fixed start or ending time, just hanging out together.
- Communication: Good communication is the lifeblood of your marriage. Good communication takes time – unhurried time.
- Acts of Service: You don’t have to do these together, but they do take time.
- Non-Sexual Touch: A quick hug is good, but she needs more – as do you. For a good, healthy relationship, you need times of prolonged touch.
- Sex: A lack of sex puts a huge stress on your marriage. As I pointed out in A Different Kind of Sex Challenge, she needs the things above to want and enjoy sex. Just making time for sex is not going to end well; you need to make time for all the rest.
Most marriages in the USofA are hurting because the couple doesn’t have enough time together. Failure to address this is saying you’re okay with a mediocre marriage. It’s also accepting the risk of adultery and divorce.
If you’re committed to being a better husband, you must find a way to spend enough time with your bride. What are you willing to sacrifice for that?
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