Yesterday I talked about how small changes can add up to a massive reaction. Getting the reaction requires doing enough to reach critical mass.
One place this happens in marriage is communication.
I’m sure you talk with your wife, but do you have deep, intimate communication with her? Do you stop at exchanging necessary information and asking each other for things, or do you share your hearts? Are you sharing surface thoughts or deep feelings?
We’ve been taught men are strong and silent. We hide our feelings because that’s what a man is supposed to do. By the time we marry we’re so good at hiding our feeling we keep them from our wife without even trying. Get naked with her in bed? Oh yeah! Get naked with her emotionally? No way!
If you want real intimacy with your wife, you must learn to share your inner self. Tell her your deepest thoughts, and your feelings. Share your hopes and fears, your wildest dreams and your secret goals. Then listen, really listen, as she shares the same things about herself.
At first, this is going to be difficult for you. It may even be painful. This is the building to the critical mass stage, and it can be hard work. But when you hit critical mass it all changes. Sharing your inner self is no longer difficult, it’s easy. In fact, you will want to share with her. You will know and be known in a way you never thought possible and it will feel great. It will strengthen your marriage and make it easier to deal with difficulties.
And there’s a bonus: Intimate communication makes a woman much, much more open to sex.