If it's been awhile since the two of you were alone together, away from home, set up a mini vacation. All you need is half a day. Hope in the car, drive an hour or two, sight see or walk some place new, have a nice meal, and head home.
Repeat every couple of months.
Last year one of you wrote to tell about your Valentine's tradition of celebrating on another day, and then keeping some young couple's kids on the 14th so they can have a nice date without forking out big bucks for babysitting.
I like it - way to bless others!
We tend to get very busy this time of year, and if we're not careful we can end up with far too little time with our brides. Have a talk with her and set up some dates for the next month.
One of our favourite holiday dates is a movie Christmas eve day - everyone is busy shopping, and the theaters are almost empty.
Please add your date ideas on-line!
As discussed in this tip, studies have found that people usually enjoy money spent on experiences (going out together) more than spending the same amount of money on buying "things". So, something to consider for Christmas instead of exchanging gifts with your bride; take the money you would spend and use it for a trip together. This could be a trip over or near Christmas, or a trip at another time.
Along these lines, my bride and our 18 year old son spent last Christmas at the beach - and we loved it. We hit a casino buffet for Christmas dinner, saw some great lighting displays at tourist spots, watched a storm come in, and window shopped. We all enjoyed it so much we are discussing doing something similar this year. This won't work so well with younger kids, but if you don't have kids at home or have older kids at home it can work well.
An article entitled "Can a marriage survive without date night?" has some comments from mums about "date night" (contains PG-13 language). The most common comment seemed to be that a "date night" is too contrived, but regular time together without the kids is a must.
Why not point your bride to the article, and ask her what she thinks? Take notes and make needed changes accordingly.
Can you help with a place for couples to get away and/or get some help? As I mentioned three months ago, we now live on a piece of property that will eventually have facilities for conferences of up to a dozen couples. The first step, now that our home is about ready for winter, is to get the two room cabin fixed up to where a couple could be comfortable there for a couple of days to a couple of weeks. If you live in the greater Spokane WA area, and have items that might be of use (see below), we would like to hear from you. We also would not turn down cash donations to help get the cabin fixed up. To e-mail me, hit reply or use the contact form. If you send a donation, please put "cabin" in the memo space on your check.
Currently Needed:
As we will be doing a lot of repair and building in the Spring, we will have need of all kinds of building materials and furnishings. We have storage space. All donations will be eligible for tax deductions to a 501(c)(3).
Our desired use for the cabin includes:
Please join us in this new adventure by praying for us and for what is being done!
I recently learned that divorce rates in the USofA are no longer growing for all but one group. Among those who have recently become empty-nesters, the divorce rate is still rising with 1 in 6 couples divorcing fairly soon after their last child leaves home. Why would couples who have been together for 20 to 30 years suddenly divorce? No doubt some of it is couples who "stayed together for the kids" but there is more to it than that. More and more people are so centering their lives around their children that they have no common ground as a couple once the kids are gone.
If your kids are still at home, PLEASE start working on being a couple NOW - it can easily be too late when the kids are gone and the problem becomes apparent. Do things as a couple, without the kids, a couple of times a week. Do at least one vacation a year without the kids, even if it's a weekend a couple hours drive from home. Work diligently to have common interest and friends, and talk about goals so they will also be common.
If you are already in empty nest trouble, I recommend the book The Second Half of Marriage: Facing the Eight Challenges of the Empty-Nest Years by David & Claudia Arp.
Depending on where you live, either early spring, with summer on the way, or early fall, with winter on the way. Spend a bit of time talking with your bride about fun things you can do together this next season. Look in a local paper to see what special events (including free) will be available.
Powered by WordPress
© 2001-2010 Daily Generous Husband Tips All Rights Reserved -- Copyright notice by Blog Copyright
Experiences beat possessions
Tuesday, July 14th, 2009Research covered here recently suggested that for long-term happiness experiences tend to beat possessions. Basically studies found folks enjoyed money spent on experiences (going out to eat) than spending the same amount of money on buying "things".
So, the next time you want to bless your bride, maybe put dinner and a movie, or a walk in the park, or a long weekend higher on the list, and "things" lower on the list.
Tags: date
Posted in Comments, Quality Time, Shared walk | No Comments »