Don’t Just Help, Stand There – or Go Away

Sometimes the best service you can offer is to do nothing at all.

She may have a need to do certain things herself, or to do it “her way”. Sometimes it’s not just about it being done her way, she wants to do it herself.  It could be a sense of accomplishment, or doing certain things may calm hew down or cheer her up.

Ask your wife if there are things she want or needs to do herself.  Also let her know if you have things you want or need to do yourself.

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2 Comments on “Don’t Just Help, Stand There – or Go Away

  1. one of the hardest challenges I have with supporting my wife is knowing when she wants help and when she wants to accomplish for herself whatever it is that she’s attempting. Constant communication and figuring out what when wrong when it did are a huge part of making it better!

  2. One further thought. What she does not mind sharing today, she may not want to share next month or year.

    We used to alternate weeks of cooking when we were ‘before children’, but after the children came along, she felt that SHE needed to be the primary cook and I took only Saturday or on request duties in the kitchen.

    Now that the kids are in college, it’s often, ‘fend for yourself’. She cooks for herself and I cook for myself, with some meals arranged by either of us.


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