Sex – when words and actions don’t mesh
Does what you say to your bride about sex match what you show in your actions? Maybe, given that our actions usually show our true feelings, I should ask if what you say matches what you think and feel?
Sadly, many guys think they have to lie about what they want, think and feel sexually. They are convinced their bride would have a fit if she knew what’s really going on in their head. I’m not just talking about the fellows whose minds have been deeply polluted by porn – a lot of guys just don’t think their wife could deal with knowing they want sex more than twice a week, or that they want to do it with the lights on.
Thing is, women are very perceptive, and if your thoughts and actions are not the same, odds are she knows something is wrong. She knows something is off, but not what – and that opens the door for her to imagine all kinds of things. For most guys, the truth is better than what she is imagining, or worrying about.
Ultimately neither of you will be happy or stratified until your actions and thoughts line up closely. The two ways to make that happen are to communicate what you think, feel and want, or work on changing desires you know are wrong – or at least wrong for the two of you.