Are you a jailer or a liberator?
This is a follow up on “Complacency’s Prison” – a post by my bride that I re-posted yesterday.
As Lori said, many women feel powerless in their lives – and their marriages. As husbands, we have the power to make that better or worse. You can do things to give her choices, and you can help her have the time and freedom to do things that will make her life feel fuller. Alternatively, you can limit her, maybe in the name of being a good wife or proper mother.
We all need to spend some of our time doing things we enjoy – just having fun. If “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy”, what does all work and no play do to our brides? No matter how much they have to do, no matter how “far behind” we may think they are, trying to limit their play or deny them things they enjoy is a bad plan. Aside from being mean, it’s not a good way to motive. It’s sort of like that saying “The floggings will continue until moral improves”!
When there’s not enough play, not enough fun; when there seems to be no control or power over her own life, a woman will spiral down into the prison of complacency. Frankly, who can blame them!
Do you want to be a liberator? You can be – if you’re willing to sacrifice some of your free time and play to ensure your bride has some of the same. Keep the kids so she can get out without them. Spend a bit of money on something just for her. Ask her what she would like to do, what she wants to become, and make those things important goals.
If you’re not a liberator, you are a jailer. Choose wisely!