Is God all you need?

The only perfect marriage © Mike_kiev |

The next few days I will be doing some more or less related posts about some statements I have heard about marriage that I don’t agree with.

Some say God can/should supply everything we need, and a spouse is not a part of that. This is usually said when someone is unhappy because their spouse is neglecting them. I understand how this “you don’t need them” message could make someone feel better, but I don’t think it’s a biblically accurate claim.

The Bible tells us that when Adam was sinless, and knew and communed with God in a way that none of ever has, it was “not good” that Adam was “alone”. If a perfect man, who walked with God, needed a bride, then how can we think we don’t? God could not (or would not) directly meet all of Adam’s needs (this is due to Adam’s limitations, not any limitation of God), so why would be suggest that God could or would meet all of our needs?

God made us with a need for another person, a person who would be so close to us that we would “be one”. Paul tells us that only those with a special gift can function well without this other person.

4 Comments on “Is God all you need?

  1. Excellent post! While God is perfectly able to meet all of our needs (both genders) He set up the world to work a certain way. He set commands and guidelines for husband an wife to follow for the benefit of the other AND themselves.

  2. May I share this? It is from my writing vaults and came about as I researched the Original Text of Gen 1-3 searching for an understanding I could live with. My hope in sharing is that these conclusions of mine might be a benefit to your own understanding of who you are and who she is. As well as who you can be together.

    Be good!

    The Hebrew phrase ‘ezer kenegdo’ is very difficult to translate into English. “A Help, meet for him,” with the Old English meaning for meet, that is, ‘precisely matched,’ is the usual translation. But even that is insufficient. And, as time has gone on, the meaning has been further insulated in modern translations to read, “A help-mate,” seeming to imply that she holds a somewhat inferior position. And inferior is certainly not what Jehovah created Ishsha and her sisters to be!
    The phrase has been translated by the ancient Jewish sage, Rashi, to read, “A help against him” He then explains this by saying, “If Adam is worthy, then she will be a help [ezer]. If he is not worthy, then she will be against him [kenegdo] for strife.” This ancient translation holds truth well while, at the same time, modern archeological work indicates that, “a strength (or power) equal to him” is also an equally valid interpretation of ‘ezer kenegdo’.
    The best single English word we have, then, that can sum up this remarkable creation is that she is his “Counterpart” with its dual idea that she is ‘uniquely fitted’ to be both his ‘complement’ and his ‘foil’; an ‘Help’ or an ‘Adversary’, benefiting him and herself, either way, simply by being herself. And this was intended to hold true in all areas of their combined being; the spiritual, the intellectual, the emotional and most especially in the area where all these things intersect, the sexual. The Woman is, indeed, ‘a strength equal to’ The Man, but, nonetheless, it was she who was created for him, not the other way around. This makes most of the words pronounced by Jehovah Elohim over ‘Chava’ (the loving, hopeful name Adam was soon to give her) to read more like a prediction. For when Ishsha and Ish allowed themselves to be turned by the words of The Nachash, which were targeted to what her adding to Jehovah Elohim’s words revealed about their thoughts, the good desire in her to be an ‘ezer kenegdo’ for Adam was then turned into a dependency (which leads to frustration) on Adam, who is now a frustrated and fearful man, with a very real curse to deal with on his satisfaction, The Earth.
    One need only look at the fatal history of women, subjected by their good desires because of Sin, to the contrariness of the equally sinful and equally lust-driven men in this world, as well as their own ages-old and livid response to their mistreatment, Feminism, to see how horribly distorted the beautiful reality has become of the shared and equal rule that Jehovah Elohim intended for us to exercise, together, as Husbands and Wives, over each other and over Creation.

  3. Good post, Paul. I have no patience with those who think the godly ideal is a platonic or nearly sexless marriage – usually the wife or some preachers.

    I remember once when a pastor at a former church had a Sunday evening series on marriage. Basically, it was communicate, communicate, communicate. Not one word about communicating (or communing) using sex. The physical is important else God would have made us spiritual beings only. But He didn’t. He made us physical beings as well. In fact the physical part of us is so important that, when Christ returns, our physical bodies are going to be resurrected to be with Him forever.

    The apostle Paul said that if you are denying your spouse sexually that you are defrauding them. I would include in ‘denying’ the act of ‘consenting’ to sex but with no real enthusiasm, or involvement in the episode. “Again!?!” “But life happened to me today. And it’s going to happen again tomorrow.” “O well, go ahead.” “Aren’t you done yet?”

    A man’s wife has the power to make him go around all day every day thinking he’s the luckiest man in the world or to go around feeling like he’s being defrauded every day. That is the power you have over your husbands, ladies.

    I’ll give one example. Long ago, I lost my job which was a huge problem because we were living in a mostly agricultural area a couple of hundred miles from our hometown. No equivalent job would be available in that area, maybe ever. And we had a 3-month old son. All this was weighing me down as I drove home to tell my wife the bad news. When I told her why I was home early, she immediately came at me like I was the sexiest man on the planet, drug me into the bedroom and for the next hour or two, had her way with me. What a confidence booster! There were no recriminations, no telling me what I should have done to keep it from happening, no calling me a loser. Just her SHOWING me in the most wonderful way possible that I was still her man and that she had confidence that I could make everything right.

    Indeed, it is not good that man should be alone.

    God bless.

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