As a man thinks …

Confident man © Alfredo Falcone |

As a man thinks, so is he. [Common paraphrase of Prov 23:7]*

I’ve been thinking about that scripture a lot recently. Not because it came up in my regular Bible reading, but because of a variety of secular articles and studies I’ve seen which say we become who and what we think we are. One place I saw this was in the  TED talk by Shawn Achor which I linked to last week. Shawn and others are finding traditional ways of dealing with employees are infective as best and often counter-productive. It turns out changing how employees see themselves makes them more productive. Ability is certainly necessary, but believing we can do something is also very important. Thinking we can without ability is worthless, but ability without some level of confidence is almost as worthless. A little ability and a lot of confidence will usually get more done than a lot of ability and a little confidence.

No, I’m not becoming one of those folks who think positive self-talk is all we need. I’ve been annoyed by that since a high school teacher** had us yell “I’ve got PMA, I’ve got PMA” (positive mental attitude) every day at the start of class. I don’t think a change of attitude will fix everything, and sometimes what is needed is less thinking and more doing. However, I am seeing more and more how “PMA” is a real and valuable commodity.

I will likely do a couple more posts on this the next few days – would love thoughts and feedback in the comments.

*Turns out my memory of this verse is not accurate or contextual. But Google shows it’s a common misquote of the verse.
** Miss Rohrer was still an awesome teacher, my favourite ever.  

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Image Credit: © Alfredo Falcone |

Shop to give links page

Links to blog posts that stood out to me this last week:


New blog this week – The Generous Wife. AKA my bride. When I first started doing weekly links, I did not link to Lori’s blog as she is all about women. Today I realised I occasionally pass on great posts from other woman focused blogs, and I should do the same with the woman who shares my heart and bed.

Black and Married with Kids

What Is Intimacy In Marriage?: Well done article, highly recommended.
8 Ways To Be A Better Husband: A MUST READ. Apply these and you will have a much better marriage!

The Generous Wife

Reach Out Together: Do good – together.
Building Trust: Brilliant three-word post!
Be Intentional About the Two of You : If you are not intentional, it won’t happen.

Happily Married After

Serving Emotionally in “Bad Times”: An great post on an important issue.

Hot, Holy and Humorous

Lust: The Pigpen or The Feast?: A very good follow up to my recent lust post.

One Flesh Marriage

Submission = Responsibility: Brad nails it!

Romantic Act of the Day

Sticking Love All Around: Look for the heart shaped sticky notes!
Panty of the Month Club: Is this a gift for her, or him? ;-)
Quit Telling Her So: YES!
Getting Rid of the Week’s Stress : Help her relax!

The Romantic Vineyard

Shame On You!: This is a great fit with my post above. When you shame someone, you change how they think of themselves.
Showing Honor: Doing this at our next marriage class!

Safe at home

Do The Small Hard Things Now At Home: Amen – failure to do those things can be disastrous!

Stupendous Marriage

Stupendous Marriage Show 037: Interviewing Lori Lowe: Another great interview.

…to Love Honor and Vacuum

Sheila did a series of posts on sex in less than perfect situations. These are geared for women – if one applies to you now I’d suggest sharing it with our wife:
Pregnancy and Sex: Can It Work?
Sex When Your Hormones Are All Over the Place
Sex After Kids: 17 Ways to Make It Happen
Menopause and Sex: What if things aren’t working?

Your Christian Marriage Restoration Station

Rules of Marriage: Great list of rules for a good marriage.

One Comment on “As a man thinks …

  1. I really needed this today. The truth in the scripture was healing. I started a new project yesterday, building a new, larger back porch and with any project there was some unseen obstacles. Those obstacles had me start questioning my ability, and quickly I became frustrated and simply put I just wanted to give up. I think a lot of times as a man when we doubt if we “have what it takes”, those doubts are planted by our Enemy who’s trying to steal and kill our joy/confidence/life/peace/ enjoyment…etc. I look forward to when I get off of work to do what I have set out to do, with confidence in who I am and what I’m able to do.

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