Start at the Top
I ended yesterday’s post by saying, “Either your spouse is a priority, or they are not. If they are, then what matters to them is a priority to you.” I want to focus on that a bit.
Saying she is important to you is nice, but the proof is in your actions. If you fail to do things she considers important, she’ll not feel you really care about her. The same is true for her actions; if she fails to do something you find important – like, for example, having sex more than once a week – her claims she cares won’t ring true.
It’s not just doing things she finds important, i’s doing the things she finds most important. If she were doing a great job on the fourth, seventh, and tenth through ninety-ninth things on your list of priorities, how would you feel? If she were doing a good job on all of the top five, and a decent job on the next five, I bet you would feel far more loved and cared for!
She’s the same way. Time and energy spent on things not on her top ten aren’t going to make a bit of difference unless you’re doing a decent job on most of the top ten.
Bottom Line: Start at the top of her priority list and work your way down without skipping anything.
The XY Code is about to go live!
I mentioned a couple of months ago I was working on something new. This Friday we hope to make our first post on The XY Code. This blog is an attempt to explain the male mind (and actions) to wives. Still working on it, but you can go check out what we are planning and sign up to receive posts by RSS or email.