Obligation and Responsibility? No Thanks!

It seems our society lacks the desire to accept responsibility and sees obligation as burdensome. This has all kinds of negative results, including devastating marriages.

In part, I think we have these problems because we have become too interested in “freedom”. We think we were born with a right to be free (this is especially prevalent in the States). Freedom is our God given birthright, and we should oppose anyone or anything limiting our freedom.

Freedom! © Serge Bertasius Photography | freedigitalphotos.net

Thing is, the Bible doesn’t echo this belief. The Jews at the time of Christ were not free; they were a conquered people with almost no rights. Many expected the Messiah to set them free by overthrowing the Romans. This expectation caused them to miss the truth of who Jesus was. Jesus was concerned with hearts and minds, not politics. Jesus said the truth set people free – but He was talking about an internal freedom. Paul talked about being a bondservant, a slave by choice to the Lord. The Bible doesn’t tell us to seek freedom, it tells us to seek and serve the Lord.

Serving the Lord comes with responsibilities and obligations, including to our spouse and marriage. Most of what we’re supposed to do with/for our wife has nothing to do with how she acts or what she does. God, not our feelings or her choices, obligates us.

I realise this can be a bitter truth, especially for those in difficult marriages. The world elevates happiness to a right and tells us we owe it to ourselves to leave a bad marriage. God’s Word neither promotes nor allows for these ideas.

There are some “side benefits” to doing it God’s way:

  • When you remove thoughts of getting out, it’s easier to find peace.
  • Committing to stay causes you to see your marriage differently.
  • You will be more motivated to work on your marriage, even when it’s difficult and painful.
  • In time, your wife may respond positively to your change in attitude and actions.


Upgrading your marriage should not be about what you can get out of it. God has placed requirements on you as a husband. Doing what He desires is not optional if you’re following Jesus!

Links may be monetised
Image Credit: © Serge Bertasius Photography | freedigitalphotos.net

Shop AmazonShop to give links page
We are donation supported – thanks for your help!
Where we’re going Contact us about speaking


This Week’s TMB Survey:

Concerned about your size?  Does the size of your penis concern you?

Great tweet of the week:

A real man loves harder than he lusts.@RealMenTalk

Links to blog posts that stood out to me this last week:

Featured Post – A must read article I saw this week:

Sheila of to] Love Honor and Vacuum postedOn Sin, Judgmentalism, and Brokenness: A Call for Compassion ◄ Some will disagree strongly, but I think this is spot on.

Black and Married with Kids

6 More Tips to Divorce Proof Your Marriage ◄ Another good list

The Generous Wife

Label Free Zone ◄ Praise what, not who.
A Little Note ◄ Sometimes the old ways mean more.

Hot, Holy and Humorous

Sex Is Not the Icing on the Cake ◄ Dead on right!
Is Your Sex Life Getting Enough Sleep? ◄ A major cause of sex problems.

Leading Men Only

When It Comes To Doubt, Don’t Believe It ◄ Is doubt limiting you?
No Need To Despair; Hope Is On Its Way ◄ “Despair is a choice” – so true!


Her Period and You – A few Survival Tips ◄ The more you know…

One Flesh Marriage

Celebrating the Emotional Side of Sex ◄ Third in the series by Shannon Ethridge.
Celebrating the Physical Side of Sex ◄ Final post in the series by Shannon Ethridge.

refine us

One Word That Can Make Any Marriage Mediocre ◄ Are you using this word too much?

Stupendous Marriage

We Are In Different Seasons ◄ Often said – probably because it is so true.

One Comment on “Obligation and Responsibility? No Thanks!

  1. So true Paul. Anything worthwhile requires commitment. Commitment is a decision that is played out over time. In marriage the becoming one is no quick fix.

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: